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Emotions are the language of a subconscious mind. Therefore, there are hidden messages in every emotion. When we identify them, understand how they serve us, and act upon them, we become emotionally intelligent. 

Dr Goleman described emotional intelligence as a person’s ability to manage and express their feelings appropriately. It can also help you to connect with your feelings. Furthermore, it turns intention into action and helps to make informed decisions.

Mental health includes emotional, psychological and social well-being. It affects how we think, feel, and act. It also helps determine how we handle stress, relate to others and make choices.

Head vs Heart

PARAMETERS OF EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

Self-awareness 

It is the form of taking a step back curiously look at your thoughts as they unfold. It can be as simple as noticing the emotions that arise when you spend time with certain people. On the contrary, it can be a layered awareness of how your thoughts feed into your feelings and behaviours. So how do you become more self-aware?

The question mentioned above is complicated, with a more complex answer. Some ways you can enhance your self-awareness is by meditating, journaling, being mindful, exercising etc.

To start with, you can regularly check in with yourself by asking: How am I feeling in my body right now? Why are these thoughts are running through my mind? What else can I think?

Self-management 

Self-management is recognising your own emotions and how they affect your thoughts and behaviour. So, how to manage oneself better?

The first step towards self-management is self-awareness. Firstly, start identifying your thoughts and emotions. Secondly, make an honest determination to keep what is required and discard what is not. Hence, you can break the cycle of negative emotion by the method of retaining and eliminating.

Thus you’re able to control impulsive feelings and behaviours, manage your emotions in healthy ways, take the initiative, follow through on commitments, and adapt to changing circumstances which all come under self- management.

Social awareness 

Social awareness is our ability to accurately pick up on the emotions of other people and understand what is going on with them. It gives you the ability to understand and respond to the needs of others and empathise.  So, how do you do it?

  • Listen.  Make a conscious effort to stop everything and listen fully to others.  Focus your attention, observe and fully listen, and you will more accurately piece together the intended message.  
  • Be present and able to give others your full attention. 
  • Watch body language as a person’s body communicates nonstop.
  • And finally, empathise, you can understand the emotions, needs, and concerns of other people, pick up on emotional cues, and you will feel comfortable socially.

Relationship management 

Relationship management involves clear communication and effective handling of conflict. It is the bond you build with others over time. Three strategies to enhance your natural communication style are:           

  • Social-awareness – The ability to empathise.
  • Curiosity – Feedback is a gift. It helps us improve in ways we cannot always see on our own.
  • Acceptance – Sometimes you have no choice and have to deal with people who press your buttons. Therefore, do not avoid the person or the situation.
Optimal emotional intelligence

Lack of emotional intelligence is one of the significant causes of deterioration in mental health. Hence, it is precisely where Emotional Quotient comes into play.

Try to find answers about why and how you are feeling and master yourself. Moreover, understand how they serve you to control them. Lastly, make an effort to acknowledge the reason behind not only the positive emotion but the complex negative ones too. 

Life is full of emotions. And your quality of life depends on your understanding of them. As Dr Rosenberg’s says, “If you can experience and move through unpleasant feelings, you can do anything you want in life.


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Mansi Pasricha
Mansi Pasricha
7 months ago

Described so simply..each word resonates..

Preetihanda Vohra
Preetihanda Vohra
Reply to  Mansi Pasricha
7 months ago

Very maturely crafted … every word seem to have a meaning …keep it up👌👍

Tanya Aggarwal
Tanya Aggarwal
7 months ago

Very well explained and elaborated on each point. Good work!

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